Valentines day is overrated!

What can I say? I don't dislike the holiday, just that I never recieve anything from my significant other. NEVER. We've been married 9 years, and he never gives me anything for v-day. This year he didn't even say hi to me when I got home from school. HMPH. I stopped putting my heart out for him a long time ago. Don't get me wrong, I still care for him deeply. I just feel that the love that we had 10 years ago when we met has dissipated into a dull routine. He only calls me when he needs help spelling something. Spanish is his first language, so he dosen't know how to write in English correctly. So I've become his dictionary. He has tons of love for his kids, and he demonstrates that everyday when he sees them. But me? There are days when he barely acknowledges my presence. He never wants to do things as a family, let alone just the two of us. Just last night we had a banquet for my son's cubscout pack, and he asked if he really had to go with us!! He has not participated in any of the pack activities, and I felt embarrased when I introduced him to the Den leader, whom I see everyday! Go figure. So for v-day I had more fun with the kids and their school parties, and a party at my school during class, that I didn't even worry about whether or not he'd get me anything. His sister thought that he would buy me flowers. Yeah right. When does he do that? Ok, he did surprise me on my birthday last year, which was the first time in over 6 years that he actually gave me flowers. I wasn't expecting anything from him anyway this year. Just like every year. Lately he's been talking on his cell phone late into the night, and drinking with his buddies instead of trying to spend time with me and talk. Could he be seeing someone else? Maybe. His actions point in that direction, but then again, I'm naturally paranoid. I always think he's seeing someone behind my back. Just now, I don't care as much as I used to. If he was, I wouldn't be surprised, since we never do anything. He hasn't even asked for sex in a few weeks, which is unusual. I'm never in the mood anyway, but I'll do it when he asks. He spends so much more time with his buddies and at work that I've been alone too much. Sometimes he'll be out until 3am on a weeknight with them (just sitting in front of the house listening to music and drinking). He only will cuddle up with me in bed when he is cold. Ok, so now I feel like crying. There's a difference in being alone and being truly lonely. True loneliness is when the person is there right next to you but won't acknowledge your presence. When he is home I feel more lonely than when he is working or away with his buddies. Enough now.